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A planet well known for it's unsuitably harsh climate and people. (Once, Catorce)


The planet has the normal characteristics of any miserable ice-world, however, in a somewhat remarkable geographical phenomenon, the thin strip of semi-habitable land near the equator is made entirely out of varying patterns of Tartan. What has caused this is currently unknown, seeing as scientific thought is currently banned within the system, however some theories state that this may have been caused by the mountainous red and yellow glaciers that once covered the entire planet deciding to move in one direction for a few thousand years, and then "screwing it" and moving in a perpendicular direction.

The temperature is usually around 0 degrees Celsius (32 degrees Fahrenheit), and it often snows. However, the inhabitants decided that the snow occasionally looked too cheery, as such they have mounted massive dying machines on the poles of the planet, which inject thick clouds of smokey dye into the air.


The culture on this planet forbids any form of kindness. The people on here are some of the best fighters in the galaxy, however, their talents are generally confined to drunken brawls and general mischief. In addition to this, it is generally frowned upon for a person to leave Tartainia, and as such, many never try.

Due to the pub mentality of the planet, much of the food is deep fired and served with spacial brew or other typical bar snacks.


Major cities on the planet include Edinbrugh and Glasgay. There is only one pub on Tartania, this pub is famous as a hideout for only the most deadly criminals and bounty hunters in the galaxy. The pub is owned by 'Mad Donald', a deadly human whom even bodega feared.

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